40 Days Instagram Free

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When I deleted my Instagram app back on Valentine's Day I thought my Instagram fast would increase in difficulty as Lent went on. I was wrong. The first three days were the hardest. The first five hours were the worst.
      I thought that in the beginning I wouldn't miss Instagram too much, but I quickly realized how much the app was a part of my life. In the first few hours whenever I was looking for something to do I habitually clicked on the location where Instagram used to be. Before bed and waking up I could no longer mindlessly scroll through photos. Whenever I was bored in class scrawling through my Instagram feed wasn't an option. Instagram became my addiction. I craved the sight of photos, the rush of excitement when you get a like on a post and the feeling of calm while scrolling through the explore page. I was the smoker, and Instagram was my cigarette.
       As Lent dragged on my withdrawal symptoms lessened. I stopped brainlessly clicking on the spot where Instagram was and I no longer desired to share posts or beg for likes. When I almost relapsed out of habit I admonished myself. 
         During my Instagram hiatus, my ethics class was having a discussion on the use of social media. One student heard on the radio that "around 85% of Instagram users have claimed to go to a certain location for the purpose of taking a picture for Instagram." I realized that was me. I have gone out of my way to find places where I can get a great photo for Instagram. I have spent hours planning pictures and captions in my head and consulting with my friends over which edit made me look the best. I could not believe how superficial I became. All I wanted on Instagram was attention. There was hardly anything meaningful in my posts. At that moment in class I realized I made the right decision to give up Instagram.
        My 40 days without Instagram was not what I thought it would be. I thought it would be a frustrating and begrudging experience. I though I would feel shut out from the world, but instead I was opened to it. The desire to constantly scroll through my feed was gone, and I no longer felt the need to broadcast my every move. Without Instagram I was happier. The pressure I felt to prove to everyone that I was happy was gone. I could actually be happy without pretending to be. Finally, I was able to live in the moment.
          No longer am I an Instagram zombie. The cure was a break from my Instagram lifestyle. I hope my desire to post photos and log onto the app are not as strong as they once were. I hope I can maintain my restraint from constantly being on the site as I have these past 40 days. I also hope that instead of using my posts to gain attention I can spread some positivity.
        Although I'm excited to view the posts I missed, I don't feel like I've missed out on anything. Instead I gained some time to clear my head and embrace the opportunities that life has offered me.

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